Fart 107: Farting with Dr. Yummy

Once upon a time in a lecture theatre, just when the lecturer enters, Gasmilla creates a 'conducive' environment for teaching and learning. The students begin to react and Gasmilla begins to sing "Mankene na mo sha?" to avoid being caught. Dr. Yummy, their lecturer, begins a lecture on farting to make the 'farter' have a clear mind after Gasmilla poses a question before her:

Gasmilla: Doc. is it bad to fart?

Dr.Yummy: No, flatulation is very necessary and I know someone 'caught a whiff' of that
(students begin to laugh).
It isn't bad. Because it is a normal physiological process just like burping or sneezing. Every time we eat, drink or swallow, we are taking in air which amasses in our intestines (predominantly oxygen and nitrogen). Digestion releases specific by-products such as methane and carbon dioxide that are not useful. Both of these cause gas to build up, leading to burping or farting.
In fact, it is such an important function that after surgeries, one of the factors that determine if a patient can be discharged is if they have passed gas as that shows that the GI system is getting back to normal!!

Nii Odoi: Then I'm sure I'm going to fart every morning to make God aware surgery whilst sleeping was successful.
(comment throws D.Y and students into a boisterous laughter)

Ayittey Powers: So where is the scent coming from at times?
(Students giggle and murmur)

Dr.Yummy: The gases themselves -- methane is potent!! Don't you remember Chemistry lab? When you mixed certain reagents, seemingly non-noxious substances will cause horrible odours? It is the same in the body. Farting becomes an issue  only for certain circumstances. Most people pass about half a litre of gas a day. Some foods cause smellier farts than others -- broccoli, beans, eggs, meat, cabbage and cauliflower. Did you know farts have been known to go up to speeds of 10ft/second and that farts are flammable!!!

Students (in unison): Flammable????

Dr.Yummy‬: Yes, they are flammable due to the Nitrogen.

Bukom Banku: oya.....ma try makw3......farting fire

Dr.Yummy‬: No! Bukom Banku - the fire has to be very close to your buttocks and that is dangerous. It is very dangerous.

Bukom Banku: Oh madam, me I'll show them say Banku is no fear fire. Banku needs fire to cook. If I fart I would cook.
(Gasmilla and Nii Odoi cheer Bukom on)

Ayittey Powers: Woooaaaa see mumu.......me I am not care. I'll beat you basabasa if I hear you sleeping for hospital.
(the class enters a roar of laughter)

Dr. Yummy: And that ends this Fun Moment brought to you by the letters F for farting, D for Dr and Y for Yummy!

(students give Dr. Yummy a standing ovation after the wonderful lecture)


Disclaimer: The drama above is purely satirical is not meant to dent the personality of any of the above celebrities. The language is broken english and is very deliberate.