#DearFutureWife: Let's Have A Simple Wedding

#DearFutureWife,

Fanciful weddings have become the order of the day as well as eating gari for 3 months after a fanciful wedding is also becoming a norm. Growing up, I always thought big weddings showed class and pomposity but on the other hand, though not always, these couples run into huge debt and most often than not, their marriages hit the rocks just like their debts.

I know most ladies love their weddings to be classy so that they can be the talk of town, but for how long dear? Just a week, farthest a month. These same people would talk if after a classy wedding, you go broke. So this is what I want us to do: have a simple wedding.

I have come to learn that our traditional weddings (what we wrongly call engagement) and the European Traditional Wedding (what we call as white wedding) are both traditional weddings so we choose one. 

Engagement, don't worry about that. My research via Wikipedia defines engagement as the period between you accepting my marriage proposal to the moment we tie the knot, whether our (African) way or their (European) way. But just in case our parents insist on having both, this is what we'd do.

During the traditional wedding, we'd invite just a few members who are and would continue to be significant to us. Not some old time family member we have not seen before whom we'd not hear from again after the wedding. Just a few so that we cut down cost on food.

For the attire, let's sew something simple in white with a touch of Kente as it's the trend now. This brings me to what we'd wear for the wedding. Honey, you are aware the cost of gowns are very expensive and now people even hire them. So this is the plan, instead of buying or hiring a gown, why don't we sew an attire which we can equally use after our wedding with the same amount? Remember, we are starting life and can't incur some future regretable costs.

Makeups, too costly. The day I met you, you were without makeups. I've grown to love you without your makeups or just a little of it. So let's not spend money on it. You're beautiful just the way you are and that's who I love you for.

Our wedding shouldn't be said to be a place for the hungry to eat. Hence this is what I suggest, we would invite just a few people; close family members and close friends. I know some friends would be vexed cos they were not invited.

As a business minded person, for such people, we'd have to sell tickets to our weddings. A ticket could go for ¢100, restricted to one user and ¢150 for couple. For that, we know their feeding is covered and their gifts would also be embedded in the cash amount just in case they bring nothing. This would prevent us from the public lashing of not inviting anyone. If they really do love us, they should buy a ticket to be there.

I know mummy and daddy would love to bring their friends but it's our wedding so we have to be firm. They would bear the cost of feeding any of their uninvited guests. Weddings shouldn't be a place for 'chop-sati'.

For the gift, we would require that all gifts be converted to cash except it is a brand new car made a year before our wedding or the very year we do our wedding. I mean, what are we using bedsheet, clocks, dining sets and saucepans for? Didn't we have some before we came together? They should give us the money and we'd buy what we want.

In as much as we'd want to make this day memorable, let's try as much as possible to cut down cost. Should we go broke after a classy wedding, these same people would mock us. Let's have it simple and by our 10th anniversary if God grants us life, we probably could go do it somewhere plush with live broadcast on all TV Stations.

People would say we are chisel but is it their chisel?

Your Dearest Future Husband,

Manuel Nii Martey Mensah