Letter To Accra Floods

Dear Flood,

The rainy season is here again and I'm so glad you're back. Oh yeah I'm glad you are cos unlike the coming of Christ which most of us ain't prepared for, Accra just can't wait to have a feel of you once again. We already have put in place structures to accommodate you as you've already witnessed from Kaneshie, Abossey Okai, Circle, Agbogbloshie and it's environs.

Just take a walk through the Kwame Nkrumah Interchange formerly known as Circle, where you created a scene on June 3rd last year, it's beautifully decorated with rubbished red carpet for your coming. The polythene bags are flying like balloons with the inscriptions 'Akwaaba' and 'Enjoy your stay'. It's indeed a sight to behold when your emissary, the Wind, decides to pass by. I'm pretty sure he's briefed you but let me also update you small. What are friends for?

People would say I'm hating but the truth is, I just met a 'gentleman' throw sachet rubber on the floor. Upon confrontation with this young man, I was reliably informed it's the work of the government. I was really baffled but then I didn't have to care cos this is someone who at the end of the day sleeps in a kiosk or on the verandah of someone's shop and when you decide to pay him a visit he would be really affected. Aside him, I've encountered educated folks who also throw waste on the streets with the thought that the government would pick them up. Little did I know you have been contracted by the government to do that work.

Your last major visitation really kept Accra neat for as long as 2 months as everyone could be seen clearing the gutters, streets and other places off filth. But you know, this is Ghana and the truth hurts but like H.E Mahama said, we do have a short term memory. The situation is not different from your last visit. It's now even worse than before but like I've said earlier, this time it's being used as a red carpet of you.

Work is ongoing to clear the Odaw River just to make sure you use that route only and nowhere else for exit but they lie bad. As long as we keep building homes on your natural path, as long as we keep making our surroundings untidy, as long as people pay bribes to continue building at inappropriate places, feel free to pass anywhere you like. Just don't try to pass by my house else you might not enjoy your stay in Accra.

This year, nobody can you stop from coming. Ghana's Rick Ross, the big man who threatened to kill you lay year for causing harm in his city is busily campaigning this year to enter parliament. He's just not had time for you. So this year, come like 'Kakai'. We the Flood Movement would be here waiting.

Lest I forget, this is the election period and the incumbent government is pleading you don't pass by to increase their political points. The opposition parties too are praying you really destroy things so that they can give to the victims to score political points. As we speak, our leaders are already stocking the warehouses with disaster aid items such as rice, gari, sugar, salt, just name them. Also, each political party has allocated some amount to cater for your coming so just in case you decide to come, just do it in grand style but don't come with fire else I won't be on talking terms with you again.

This year, your coming is very much anticipated and preparations towards your coming is very impressive. I bet majority of Ghanaians would be disappointed if you don't show upbut please do me a favour, please do not affect the innocent people. I mean the people who in no way contributed to your coming or right of passage. They are the good Ghanaians.

The BNI is coming for me cos I'm writing this letter. They may tag it as an act on terrorism so let me end it here. You don't have to reply since I maybe under interrogation by the BNI for colluding and conniving. Let's play safe but don't forget to say hi when you come to Accra. Have a floody day.

Signed,
Nii Bavard de Komisatirist

NB: Images used remain the intellectual property of the Black Narrator.